The Struggle is Real: 25 Hilariously Relatable Tweets About Trying to Be Healthy

Eating a salad for lunch is good if you want to feel healthy and smug for the first hour and then filled with hangry rage for the next three.

— Courtney Ellis 🎈 (@courtneyellis) May 25, 2024

I never buy chips because then I’ll eat them, so instead I look in my pantry everyday and am disappointed that I don’t have any chips.

— Sara Buckley (@nottheworstmom) August 27, 2018

I would do literally anything to lose 5 pounds right now except change my diet or increase my exercise.

— Laura Marie (@lmegordon) April 21, 2024

Before I get in shape, does anybody like me chubby?

— PythaGauri Theorem (@DramebaazPorgi) May 10, 2022

Adulthood is when you constantly diet and exercise so you can maintain being 20lbs overweight

— Bart (@bartandsoul) May 16, 2022

My go-to workout is 30 minutes of cardio followed by 5 years of rest.

— Jessie (@mommajessiec) April 18, 2022

I didn't gain weight, I am just another victim of inflation

— nice things I say to myself (@meantomyself) June 23, 2022

nothing quite as dangerous as “getting in a groove” when you’re eating chips

— brent (@murrman5) December 14, 2022

Saw a couple holding hands while jogging and it made me hopeful that one day I will meet someone who will hate them with me.

— Robin McCauley Lynch (@RobinMcCauley) March 5, 2014

My husband can eat an entire box of girl scout cookies in one sitting with no repercussions but if I make eye contact with a sleeve of tagalongs I gain 3 pounds

— One Awkward Mom (@oneawkwardmom) January 30, 2023

I don’t know who needs to hear this but living your life to the fullest does not have to involve hiking

— todd dillard (@toddedillard) July 21, 2022

I physically need 0 cookies but I emotionally need 37.

— Jessie (@mommajessiec) October 26, 2022

trying the new “baked potato diet.” It’s just eating as many baked potatoes as I want and feeling happy

— ely kreimendahl (@ElyKreimendahl) July 26, 2022

My diet logic:

I already failed by eating one cookie.

Might as well eat 75 more.

— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) July 7, 2017

Taking breaks from exercise, or rest days, is very important to a fitness regimen. I’m on rest day 532 and I feel great.

— Katie D (@KatieDeal99) May 14, 2022

Some couples exercise together.

My wife and I send each other articles when we're sitting in the same room.

— Dan Regan (@DanRegan_Comedy) October 7, 2022

DOCTOR: How often do you exercise?
ME: 3 times
DOCTOR: A week? A month?
ME: I have given my answer

— The Dad (@thedad) September 7, 2018

Apparently, my daily diet is known in athletic circles as “carb loading.”

— Kent Graham (@KentWGraham) March 4, 2015

Use cauliflower as a substitute for mashed potatoes, rice, and any joy in your life. You have no friends now, there is only cauliflower.

— Ally (@TragicAllyHere) March 11, 2017

ATE A SALAD FOR DINNER LAST NIGHT

WELL IT WAS MOSTLY CROUTONS & TOMATOES.

WELL REALLY IT WAS JUST ONE BIG, ROUND CROUTON COVERED WITH TOMATO SAUCE. AND CHEESE.

FINE, IT WAS PIZZA. I ATE A PIZZA.

— mariana Z (@mariana057) March 24, 2021

If by yoga you mean reaching the outlet to plug in my charger without getting out of bed, then yes, I do yoga

— One Awkward Mom (@oneawkwardmom) October 16, 2022

Husband “I thought you were dieting?”

Me “I am”

Husband “You just ate 6 Oreos”

Me “Yes but I want to eat 12. See – Dieting”

— Cydni Beer (@cydbeer) March 16, 2018

Me before grocery shopping: healthy foods, no impulse buys, I can do this

Me during grocery shopping: they make chocolate filled marshmallows???

— Katie D (@KatieDeal99) June 30, 2024

intermittent fasting? i just slept 7 hours without a snack what more do you want from me?

— That Mom Tho (@mom_tho) May 5, 2021

I caught my husband eating the last of the ice cream last night. First of all, we are supposed to be dieting together. Second of all, I was going to eat that.

— Jessie (@mommajessiec) July 6, 2020