20 Funny Tweets About Winter We Can All Relate To

The only people who love snow are the people who never have to shovel snow.

— Dan Regan (@DanRegan_Comedy) January 7, 2024

Science: Domesticated dogs are most closely related to gray wolves.

My dog: There is snow in my paw and now you must carry me.

— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) January 9, 2022

*4-8 inches of snow forecasted*

South: CANCEL ALL ACTIVITIES AND SEEK SHELTER NOW

Midwest: looks like I’ll have to get my winter coat out finally

— Midwest vs. Everybody (@midwestern_ope) January 8, 2024

I’m sorry for who I was when it was -20° and windy

— Midwest vs. Everybody (@midwestern_ope) January 23, 2024

I woke up to someone snow blowing their driveway at 6 AM. I taught him a lesson by locking him outside.

— Jessie (@mommajessiec) December 30, 2020

According to multiple storm models we're getting between 1 to 183 inches of snow.

— Dan Regan (@DanRegan_Comedy) January 3, 2024

I hate when I see a bug in my house in the winter like excuse me sir aren’t you supposed to be dead?

— ellie schnitt (@holy_schnitt) November 24, 2020

The Midwest urge to say “it’s warm out” when it’s 30° instead of 3°

— Midwest vs. Everybody (@midwestern_ope) January 22, 2024

Make your child angry today by trying to protect them from hypothermia.

— Kim Bongiorno (@LetMeStart) April 2, 2018

the midwest experience is being taught how to drive on snow and ice via a series of near-death experiences while your dad yells at you to turn INTO the skid and that is why we are like this

— ellie schnitt (@holy_schnitt) August 17, 2022

5-year-old: Why is the snow still here?

Me: Because it hasn't melted yet.

5: But I'm done with it.

— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) February 20, 2021

It may snow in Atlanta so I just bought 47 loaves of bread and now I’m headed out to the interstate so I can get stranded in a good spot.

— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) January 14, 2022

Every conversation with a child getting ready for school in the winter ends with a parent yelling, "FINE, THEN FREEZE."

— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) January 11, 2022

I don’t like to brag but it only took me 47 minutes to get all 3 kids in their coats, hats, gloves & scarves this morning

— MumInBits (@MumInBits) December 13, 2019

When you get older “it’s too cold” is a valid excuse to not leave your house

— Ally Kay (@Ally_Kayyy) November 26, 2018

I’m at the age where I see a huge, beautiful mansion in a movie and think, “How much does it cost to heat that house in the winter?”

— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) November 11, 2023

Parkour was invented in the living rooms of midwesterners when children were stuck indoors for too long during the cold winter break.

— Sara Says Stop (@PetrickSara) December 27, 2017

Nobody:

Midwesterners: it’s not so bad without the wind

— Midwest vs. Everybody (@midwestern_ope) November 11, 2023

I’m sorry, I’m going to have to cancel, I’m completely snowed in pic.twitter.com/LPMLmONhlZ

— VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) March 9, 2023

Midwesterners toxic trait is thinking “the rear defrost will take care of that” pic.twitter.com/S728qX2glT

— Midwest vs. Everybody (@midwestern_ope) January 12, 2024