Scoopfuls of Humor: 21 Funny and Relatable Tweets About Ice Cream

“You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy ice cream, and that is pretty much the same thing.” (unknown)

Happy National Ice Cream Day, friends! Do you know the most popular ice cream flavors in the United States? According to a YouGov poll, here’s how they rank:

Vanilla
Chocolate
Strawberry
Cookies & Cream
Chocolate chip
Butter Pecan
Chocolate chip cookie dough
Mint chocolate chip
Caramel
Neapolitan

My favorite flavor, coconut, did not make the list, boo-hoo.

I’ve rounded up 20 of the funniest tweets about everyone’s favorite treat. Hope these bring you some laughs and hope you get to enjoy some ice cream today!

Janene

#1 The kid knows how to game the system…

6-year-old: It's Ice Cream Breakfast Day!

Me: That's not a thing.

6: It is if you don't tell Mom.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) August 8, 2020

#2 LOL, highly likely!

we heard a loud beep in McDonald's and my daughter asked if it was their ice cream machine flatlining
— 🌜🤷‍♂️🎅🏽Dad Moon Rising 🎅🏽🤷‍♂️🌛 (@raoulvilla) November 15, 2022

#3 Pretty much…

Them: Listen to your body more.

Body: You're old. And you want ice cream.
— Abby Heugel (@AbbyHasIssues) September 30, 2018

#4 Jessie always makes me laugh…

I caught my husband eating the last of the ice cream last night. First of all, we are supposed to be dieting together. Second of all, I was going to eat that.
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) July 6, 2020

#5 Ok, that would be hilarious if he actually came home with a note…

*asks grocery store manager to write a note telling my wife that I looked everywhere but couldn’t find the ice cream she wanted*
— Josh (@iwearaonesie) May 22, 2018

#6 Tough love…

My kid asked me to hold her ice cream without eating any and I was like, I love you kid but some lessons you have to learn the hard way
— Real Life Mommy (@reallifemommy3) July 10, 2022

#7 Busted!

Ice cream employee: I didn't know you had kids! You always come in by yourself.

Kids: WHAT?! MOM!

It's like she didn't want a tip.
— Julie Burton (@ksujulie) April 10, 2021

#8 Big mistake…

My husband just bought ice cream with raisins. So, that was a fun marriage.
— smerobin (@smerobin) March 12, 2019

#9 Ha ha, every parent knows that feeling…

Daughter just wandered in after being put to bed and I hid the ice cream I was eating like it was drugs.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) September 30, 2022

#10 I like his style…

“Ice cream is good for you when you’re sick!”

– My 4yo who is clearly the doctor I’ve been looking for
— Kevin The Dad (@kevinthedad) February 3, 2022

#11 Hey, calcium is calcium, right??

I always have a glass of milk before bed, only it’s frozen and called ice cream
— Real Life Mommy (@reallifemommy3) December 30, 2020

#12 Gotta love teenagers…

Today my 17yo son asked me where we keep the ice cream. There goes that college scholarship we've been striving for.
— 🎭ᑌᖇᔕᑌᒪᗩ🎭 (@3sunzzz) March 27, 2021

#13 My favorite soft serve is the one I always had as a kid growing up in New York…Carvel. I would get a vanilla cone with rainbow sprinkles and it was the BEST. Now I live on the west coast and we have Dairy Queen, which is good, but not nearly as good as Carvel.

went out for ice cream tonight and my friend was like “wow this is so good I haven’t had soft serve in 15 years!” and i didn’t know how to tell him I eat soft serve like 3 times a week
— ely kreimendahl (@ElyKreimendahl) July 13, 2022

#14 “A” for effort…

It doesn't matter if the answer to your problems wasn't at the bottom of that carton of ice cream.

The important thing is that you tried.
— Abby Heugel (@AbbyHasIssues) August 7, 2019

#15 Maybe that’s all you really need LOL…

I just watched 'Tidying Up'. If I threw away everything in my kitchen that didn't bring me joy, all I'd have left is a corkscrew and an ice cream scoop.
— 🎭ᑌᖇᔕᑌᒪᗩ🎭 (@3sunzzz) February 2, 2019

#16 Seems logical to me!

I just had an ice cream as a reward for not having a third slice of pizza. Follow me for more healthy eating tips.
— mom mom mom mom mom (@notmythirdrodeo) December 9, 2020

#17 Exactly…

Took my daughter and her best friend to dinner and a show with endless snacks and sodas but we didn’t get ice cream afterwards so naturally this night will forever be known as “that night you didn’t get us ice cream.”
— NicholasG (@Dad_At_Law) May 15, 2022

#18 That kid is going to make a really good husband one day…

I’m working from home and I’m up to my eyeballs in a nasty divorce trial prep.

My kid just walked in and handed me an ice cream sandwich and said, “This will take the edge off” and walked out of the room.

Is he a Rockstar? Superstar? My own personal Jesus? I haven’t decided yet
— Lady Lawya (@Parkerlawyer) July 9, 2019

#19 Everybody needs an Auntie Ice Cream…

My 7yo has three aunts. He calls them Auntie Ice Cream, Auntie Lego, and Auntie Pam. Time to step up your auntie game, Pam.
— Daddy Go Fish (@daddygofish) July 2, 2022

#20 Final score: Six-year-old (1) Dad: (0)

6yo: I’m done, can I have ice cream?

Me: Not until you’ve eaten all your food.

6yo: But I’m full

Me: If you’re full, you don’t need ice cream

6yo: My stomach is full of food but ice cream will fill in all the cracks

Me:

6yo:

Me: I don’t know enough science to dispute that
— The Dad (@thedad) November 1, 2022

#21 And that’s why Grandmas are the best!

*overheard from the other room

8yo: Can I have an ice cream sandwich?

Grandma: Did you finish your dinner?

8yo: No

Grandma: Just one then
— Robert Knop (@FatherWithTwins) December 17, 2017