“Here’s what I’ve learned about raising boys… if you keep ’em busy, they’re fine. You let ’em get bored, they’ll dismantle your house board by board.” – Kenny Rogers
I’ve rounded up some funny and relatable quips from parents of boys to share with you…enjoy!
#1
My son just let his girlfriend “borrow” his hoodie, should I tell him.
— Not Today Eric (@NotTodayEric) November 3, 2023
#2
Today at pick-up, the childcare teacher informed me that my darling son was caught red-handed trying to eat another child's banana. She showed me the confiscated banana as proof. I looked over at him sternly, and caught him trying to eat yet another child's banana.
— sarah (@sarahradz_) July 21, 2023
#3
Me and my son are the only ones home tonight and he talked to me for 2 straight hours until I said "Hey bud I just need a half an hour to do a little bit of work," and he said sympathetically "I bet," then continued talking to me for another 2 hours.
— Kristen Mulrooney (@missmulrooney) June 19, 2024
#4
My son on why Caleb is his best friend at kindergarten: "He doesn't really speak English, so we can skip all the talking and just get right to the karate."
— Henpecked Hal (@HenpeckedHal) October 1, 2021
#5
My 9yo son as I dropped him off at school, "time to make some money!" Apparently he's selling his Halloween candy to the kids who aren't allowed to have candy at home.
— Marcy G (@BunAndLeggings) November 3, 2022
#6
Had dinner with a family who limits their kids’ TV and sugar consumption and after they left my 4yo son rolled into the kitchen on his scooter and said “I eat a million ice creams and watch a million things on TV. It’s the only thing I love.” then rolled away.
— Lucy Huber (@clhubes) August 7, 2024
#7
My son's teacher sent images of all the jackets and hoodies left behind in his class at the end of the school year. 4 out of 5 of them belonged to my kid
— nice things I say to myself (@meantomyself) June 28, 2022
#8
Moms of little boys — go ahead and soak up that sweet baby boy smell, because in a few years his feet will stink so badly you'll pull the car over, convinced there's a rotting raccoon carcass in it.
— The 21st Century SAHM (@21stcenturysahm) May 3, 2018
#9
What’s it like having 4 boys?
— Sarcastic Mommy (@sarcasticmommy4) November 3, 2021
My son just threw a waffle into the ceiling fan so he could see what would happen, with all of his brothers cheering him on.
Send help.
#10
Congratulations on your new baby boy! You will be finding Nerf bullets in strange places for the next 20 years.
— Abe Yospe (@Cheeseboy22) May 11, 2019
#11
Last night, my 3 year old kicked me during a tantrum. As I tucked him in bed later, he apologized. "I'll never kick you again," he said, pulling me in closer and kissing my cheek. "Just do exactly what I tell you to do and I'll never have to kick you again." My son is a mobster.
— Henpecked Hal (@HenpeckedHal) October 4, 2019
#12
My son’s new landlord asked if I wanted a key to the house he will be sharing with three other 19 year old boys and I’ve never wanted anything less in my entire life.
— Sweet Momissa (@sweetmomissa) June 22, 2024
#13
My son just said he’s going to call me “Squishy” to match my stomach and now I need to have another kid just so I can have a favorite
— AsKateWouldHaveIt (@KateWouldHaveIt) June 3, 2018
#14
Please pray for my son as he was recently asked to try on a pair of dress shoes.
— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) October 25, 2019
#15 Yup!
My son when I tell him to smile vs when I yell out “poop!” pic.twitter.com/ui6TuPOaC5
— Adam Perry (@misterperry) September 14, 2022
#16
My son interrupted my phone call to tell me that he was going to die of boredom. I informed him that was impossible since I'm still alive after listening to him talk about Minecraft for the last 5 years.
— KJ (@IDontSpeakWhine) June 7, 2021
#17
My 10 y/o son has a lot of friends who show up on our doorstep but by far my most fave lil dude has got to be the one who always appears holdin a fistful of ham
— DonutHawk (@StruggleDisplay) April 30, 2024
#18
Good luck robbing my house. My home security system is LEGOs on the floor.
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) June 29, 2020
#19
You're going to miss this, I whisper to myself as I'm shot in the butt with a nerf gun while unclogging the toilet.
— The 21st Century SAHM (@21stcenturysahm) January 26, 2018
#20
My son just woke up from his nap SOBBING and I asked what was the matter and he said, still crying, “I love trains.”
— Lucy Huber (@clhubes) May 16, 2022
#21
Me: My daughters are fighting non stop this summer.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) July 19, 2022
Parent with sons: My boys tore off our garage door yesterday and painted 1/5 of our house orange.
#22
One time my son was playing “store” in a hotel room we were in. I came out of the shower and he had taken every bottle out of the minibar and stacked them in rows on the floor. “What can I get ya?” he asked. It was a Vegas room with motion sensored monitors. I almost fainted.
— Lady Lawya (@Parkerlawyer) July 14, 2023
#23
If I can pee into a tiny cup at the doctor’s office that I have to hold myself, why can’t boys pee into a giant bowl bolted to the floor?
— Mommy Needs A Life (@mom_needsalife) September 11, 2022
#24
My wife teaches 8th grade, which means half the boys haven’t discovered deodorant yet and the other half have discovered Axe Body Spray
— TwinzerDad (@TwinzerDad) September 3, 2023
#25
Them: What’s it like raising a boy?
— Close to Classy (@closetoclassy) April 10, 2022
Me: I have a 12ft ceiling in my living room and there’s chili on it
