The saying “It’s funny because it’s true” definitely applies to each of these tweets. There are some things only women truly understand.
Each of these quips made me laugh because they are so completely relatable…for instance, no doctor has EVER seen my bra LOL.
Hope these bring you some laughs!
Janene
#1
When did we all decide that women don’t want the second half of the shirt anymore? Did I miss that meeting??
— Katie D (@KatieDeal99) February 4, 2024
#2
i think it’s funny when some men think women’s greatest fear is getting older while surrounded by friends and cats.
— emily may (@emilykmay) October 26, 2023
#3
I don't dress for women. I don't dress for men. I dress for the weather, mainly.
— Stabbatha Christy (@LoveNLunchmeat) April 21, 2024
#4
Have never identified more with anyone than I just did with the woman who walked into the grocery store in front of me, shook her head, said “I can’t be making these kinds of decisions today” and walked right back out
— Amber Sparks (@ambernoelle) August 31, 2023
#5
i just want a covered porch so i can sit outside in thunderstorms like an old lady with my coffee and mumble “we needed this”
— Rebecca Mix (Updates) (@mixbecca) May 21, 2022
#6
If you’re a manufacturer of sports bras or women’s bathing suits, I’m begging you: sew the pads in or just don’t include them. I’m tired.
— stangle’s kid (@stangleskid) May 27, 2024
#7
Men will be like “women are such a mystery” while walking past the basket that has been strategically placed at the bottom of the stairs for the 80th time.
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) August 24, 2022
#8
Hmm yes I’m fully aware that the gynecologist is about to look inside my body but I’ll continue hiding my bra and underwear under my folded jeans thank you
— Sam Reece (@ItSamReece) December 26, 2020
#9
I was really cranky and my husband asked if I was about to get my period and I said “JUST BC A WOMAN IS CRANKY DOESN’T MEAN SHE’S ABOUT TO GET HER PERIOD” but then I did get my period and I had to pretend I didn’t get my period so I didn’t have to admit that’s why I was cranky
— MumInBits (@MumInBits) July 11, 2021
#10
I accidentally squeezed out conditioner first. I held it in my palm and, with my other hand, squeezed shampoo onto my wrist, scooped it up and washed my hair with one hand. Then I used the conditioner.
— Becky Vieira | Witty Otter (@wittyotter_) March 31, 2021
Guys reading this have no idea why, but most women are like, “I get it.”
#11
A woman cut in front of me at the store with a box of tampons, ice cream, and wine in her cart. I wasn’t about to mess with that situation.
— Abby Heugel (@AbbyHasIssues) November 1, 2016
#12
No one goes to target because they need something. You go to target and let target tell you what you need.
— haley (@haley_copeland) January 31, 2018
#13
If I complain about being out of shape I don’t actually want fitness tips and workouts to try. I just want to complain and remain out of shape. What is wrong with you people.
— Mommy Needs A Life (@mom_needsalife) March 6, 2021
#14
My 8yo had the audacity to ask me why I cross my legs when I sneeze.
— Shannon (@ShannonJCurtin) September 11, 2022
You, dude. You are the reason.
#15
Had a repairman over for a quote, and as I was explaining the issue, my husband walked in, and suddenly the repairman couldn’t see or hear me. But that’s okay, he had a nice conversation with my husband and I hired someone else to do the job.
— krista pacion (@kristabellerina) June 1, 2022
#16
Took my puppy to the vet today and they distracted him with a cozy bed, cookies, and cheese so my gynecologist needs to up their game.
— My Life Is The Pitts Family (@LifePitts) September 16, 2022
#17
My husband didn’t have Snapchat so I convinced him to download it “because it will be fun!” and the first request he received was from his ex-girlfriend, so I deleted my husband’s Snapchat bc what grown man needs a stupid Snapchat anyway.
— Lady Lawya (@Parkerlawyer) February 17, 2018
#18
I sometimes enjoy dressing up and going out to socialize, but dear God, is there a simpler joy on this planet other than sitting ugly, bra-less and comfortable in your own home covered in corn chip crumbs? 5/5 Highly recommend.
— Susan McLean (@NoDomesticDiva) June 26, 2019
#19
Behind every great man is the drawer I need to get into why are you even in the kitchen right now
— human aaron (@humanaaron) August 29, 2020
#20
The mechanic asked if I needed to call my husband before buying new tires for my car, so I asked him where the rotary phone was so I could call the 1950s
— meghan (@deloisivete) February 11, 2023
#21
I never buy chips because then I’ll eat them, so instead I look in my pantry everyday and am disappointed that I don’t have any chips.
— Sara Buckley (@nottheworstmom) August 27, 2018
#22
I know it’s time to clean out my purse when my car assumes it’s a second passenger who’s not wearing their seatbelt.
— Close to Classy (@closetoclassy) July 9, 2019
#23
Prayers for my husband who very tragically got me nothing for our anniversary when I specifically told him I wanted nothing for our anniversary.
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) September 28, 2020
#24
“when was your last menstrual period?” crazy you think I would know that when I don’t even know what day it is
— ely kreimendahl (@ElyKreimendahl) August 3, 2022
#25
Welcome to middle age. You now get stuck in clothes. Godspeed removing that top without dislocating your shoulder.
— Jacana Mommy (@jacanamommy) July 19, 2023
And one more I just found…
I just think it would be better for everyone if the people who make adhesive for maxi pads and the people who make adhesive for bookstore price stickers switched jobs
— Janel Comeau (@VeryBadLlama) January 16, 2024
