20 Funny Tweets That Nail What Family Gatherings Are Really Like

The older you get the more holidays become about keeping your father off a ladder

— mike ginn (@shutupmikeginn) November 27, 2014

My family has been giving each other the same five gift bags since 1984.

— Dan Regan (@DanRegan_Comedy) October 13, 2022

My family says their goodbyes then stand around talking for 30-45 more minutes.

— MELISSA 💘 (@Melissa_in_TN) July 5, 2022

What wine pairs best with finding out my in-laws are staying a day longer than I thought

— meghan (@deloisivete) December 23, 2022

Shoutout to everyone on family tech support duty over the holidays

— Marques Brownlee (@MKBHD) December 24, 2019

Thanksgiving Pro Tip:
Never eat any food offered to you by an adorable toddler relative. It might look like a cookie, or piece of candy, but it’s actually the flu.

— Sara Says Stop (@PetrickSara) November 22, 2017

I just blocked two family members on social media.
The holidays are going to be fun this year.

— sixfootcandy (@sixfootcandy) November 15, 2022

☃️Let’s have a cozy cup of hot cocoa while we pore over family holiday newsletters for grammatical errors!

— Myrna Tellingheusen (@PearlsFromMyrna) December 20, 2017

First rule of family gatherings, always bring your own car so you can leave whenever you want.

— ⚡️Gordon ⚡️ (@coastaln8v73) August 18, 2019

I'm up for any holiday party as long as it starts at six, ends by eight, involves food, and doesn't require real pants.

— Abby Heugel (@AbbyHasIssues) November 24, 2018

Autocorrect just changed “I’ll host everyone” to “I hate everyone.”

Long story short, I’m free for the holidays now.

— sixfootcandy (@sixfootcandy) November 28, 2022

My family plays cornhole for money as a part of our family Thanksgiving tradition.

We are playing for a total prize purse of $200 but you would think it’s $200,000.

My aunt and uncle are getting divorced because she missed a shot. It’s ugly.

— Lady Lawya (@Parkerlawyer) November 28, 2019

no one is weirder than your dads side of the family 🤣🤣🤣

— linda 🍓 (@gawwdiis) September 24, 2022

so I met my great great aunt for the first time and I was like “tell me about our family history, our stories, like what runs in our family?!?” and she was like “well, honey….mostly mental illness.”

— ely kreimendahl (@ElyKreimendahl) December 27, 2022

Before you marry someone, find out if their family drinks mimosas or runs 5ks on holiday mornings.

— TWEETS ABOUT WINE (@wwlwine) October 26, 2019

Fun fact: The most powerful person in any family is the person who tells the other family members what to bring to Thanksgiving dinner.

— Boyd's Backyard™ (@TheBoydP) November 22, 2019

this is late but my favorite part of thanksgiving is when tier 2 family leaves and tier 1 immediately gathers around talking shit about them

— ely kreimendahl (@ElyKreimendahl) November 27, 2021

I recently bought a new hearing aid. I haven't told my family that my hearing is much improved, but I have changed my will twice.

— Bryony Burrell (@lifeofbryony) June 3, 2020