Top 20 Funny and Relatable Tweets About Marriage in October 2023

One of the best highs a husband can experience is when he realizes the reason his wife is mad, is not because of him.

— My Life As Dad (@milifeasdad) October 20, 2023

My husband sure has a lot of opinions on which movie he’s gonna sleep through

— I Hide From My Kids (@IHideFromMyKids) October 15, 2023

My husband sent me a photo to show he changed the overhead light in our stairwell, and I thought about sending him photos of everything I accomplish in a day but that would break the internet.

— krista pacion (@kristabellerina) October 1, 2023

Congratulations to my wife on the purchase of her 3 millionth candle.

— Dan Regan (@DanRegan_Comedy) October 17, 2023

My wife was trying to tell me a quick story and after the umpteenth time our kids interrupted her she said, “Nevermind, maybe we can talk again when they’re grown up,” and that about sums up being married with kids.

— NicholasG (@Dad_At_Law) October 12, 2023

It's my 23rd wedding anniversary today and my husband decided to share a picture of us where I'm standing at Cape Spear at 5am, swollen faced, no make up, not even smiling. He, however, looks great and I'm glad for him because the last anniversary post should be the best.

— Annie Hayward (@annieduck821) October 14, 2023

My husband and I are going away for the weekend. He just came downstairs and asked me if he needed to pack “restaurant clothes.” He is 55 years old.

— Lady Lawya (@Parkerlawyer) October 13, 2023

If marriage taught me anything, it’s that women have a whole house and men have a chair and one random drawer in the kitchen.

— Tandy (@dantypo) October 24, 2023

Me: I thought you said you were taking these boxes to the garage

My Husband: Yeah, at some point

Our 7 YO, from the other room: That means she wants you to do it now!

— Not the Nanny (@not_thenanny) October 1, 2023

My wife just said "It's freezing in here."

Let the annual Thermostat Games begin.

— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) October 31, 2023

Turns out, marriage *is* hard. My husband just cooked a lasagna for 70 minutes in an oven that wasn’t on.

— Carissa is in Barbie Mode (@CarissasNewLife) October 24, 2023

After nine years of marriage, I can always guess what's bothering my wife. I'm never right, but I can always guess.

— Henpecked Hal (@HenpeckedHal) October 6, 2023

We have a photographer at our house for family and newborn pictures, so naturally my husband is out cleaning the grill.

— One Awkward Mom (@oneawkwardmom) October 27, 2023

Me: Whatcha watching?
Wife: The Good Wife.
Me: Getting any pointers?

– why I'm sleeping on the couch tonight

— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) October 22, 2023

My wife and I wanted to go to a movie but it didn't start until 4:30PM, so we'll try another day when we won't be out all night.

— Dan Regan (@DanRegan_Comedy) October 30, 2023

Me, after doing a single one of the many chores my wife typically does every day pic.twitter.com/p288kvBE4j

— The Dad (@thedad) October 15, 2023

Once married the woman takes over the entire closet and the man stores everything he owns in his left cargo pocket

— Vinod Chhaproo (@Chhapiness) October 5, 2023

My husband planned back-to-back activities for us this weekend like he forgot we’re both introverts.

— krista pacion (@kristabellerina) October 20, 2023

Told my husband to put the soup in the fridge and he put the entire crockpot in there. 😳🤷🏼‍♀️ pic.twitter.com/7aBJkqVITP

— Clare Zim, MD (@ClareZimMD) October 7, 2023

I laughed out loud! 🤣 pic.twitter.com/qUowIzr6zc

— Figen (@TheFigen_) October 25, 2023