Another week and and another round of funny and relatable tweets from parents!
Here are some of my favorite quips from this week.
Wishing you all a great weekend!
Janene
#1
My 4-year-old came to give me a hug and a kiss before bed and tell me she loves me and point to the space between my eyebrows and say "it's ok that you have hair there"
— Kristen Mulrooney (@missmulrooney) September 23, 2024
#2
I don't know why you people all say being a parent is hard. I've been a parent for 12 hours and it's been super easy. I can't imagine this will change when we leave the hospital and robust support team of energetic professionals who bring us whatever we need.
— Eli McCann (@EliMcCann) September 24, 2024
#3
Here’s a fun activity you can do with your kids on rainy days when they have too much energy:
— Jennifer Parker (@Mrs_JParker) September 22, 2024
Go shopping at Target and leave them at home with their dad.
#4
I asked my mom about parenting and she said: “the first 40 years are the hardest.”
— Anne Whitehead (@whiteheadcomm) September 23, 2024
Her oldest child is 38. 🤣
#5
The pediatrician: What do you eat at your house?
— Courtney Ellis 🎈 (@courtneyellis) September 26, 2024
My 5yo: MOSTLY NACHOS
Me: I mean, that's not ALL we eat, hon.
5yo: YOU ARE RIGHT. WE ALSO EAT COSTCO PIZZA
#6
My husband just got a new job so he got sent some COBRA forms in the mail.
— Lucy Huber (@clhubes) September 25, 2024
Husband: We don’t actually need COBRA, though, my health insurance already started.
4yo: YES WE DO NEED A COBRA
#7
4yo walked in the house after school, dropped her pants, sighed like she just finished a 9-5, and then spent the afternoon lounging on the couch in her underwear. Guess she’s ready for adulthood.
— MommyingHard (@MommyingHard) September 25, 2024
#8
Child [doing homework]: What's an example of a palindrome?
— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) September 23, 2024
Me: Mom.
Child: Ugh. Fine. Mom, what's an example of a palindrome?
Wife: Dad.
Child: OHMYGOD WHY WON'T YOU GUYS HELP ME
#9
2.5 year old, after 6 months of books about new baby sisters, two months of more explicit conversation, tons of hoopla about his role as a big brother, and a week of sharing space with her:
— Jenée (@jdesmondharris) September 26, 2024
“… Where’s that baby’s mommy?”
#10
My son said he isn't returning home from college until Thanksgiving so we’re turning his bedroom into a Spirit Halloween.
— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) September 26, 2024
#11
if there is a particular food you would like your children to eat less, just go buy a massive box of it at Costco
— Taylor Schumann (@taylorsschumann) September 25, 2024
#12
My 6yo lost his first tooth today and wants to know when the dentist is coming.
— mom mom mom mom mom (@notmythirdrodeo) September 25, 2024
#13
My 5yo: THE THING ABOUT LIZARDS WITH LONG TAILS IS THAT THEY ARE VERY MEAN.
— Courtney Ellis 🎈 (@courtneyellis) September 24, 2024
Me: How do you know that?
5: SOME THINGS YOU JUST KNOW.
#14
It’s the first day of fall and we don’t have a single mum or decorative gourd by our front door. Please respect our privacy during this difficult time.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) September 22, 2024
#15
Just texted my neighborhood moms chat and asked if anyone had any ketchup because I’d already started making chicken nuggets but realized we were out and I’m scared of my 4yo and immediately two people offered it. Hashtag find your village.
— Lucy Huber (@clhubes) September 24, 2024
#16
My child came home from school to tell me that one of his friend’s mothers works in Human Resources, which he assumed is the same as a stay-at-home mother. I asked him why he thought that and he told me that I am in charge of all the resources for the humans in our house.
— StressieBessie (@EPrecipice) September 24, 2024
#17
Just heard a loud crash from the other room and then my kid asked who wanted to see what 1300 legos looked like, so that's probably fine
— meghan (@deloisivete) September 24, 2024
#18
My daughter wants an American girl doll but she wants the 90s one and I’m like I did NOT give birth to you so that you could put my childhood in the same historical category as the Revolutionary War
— Amber Sparks (@ambernoelle) September 23, 2024
#19
I woke up to my 5 year-old rubbing my back & telling me “you’re the most special mommy in the world” 😊
— Blonde Musings 🇺🇸 (@musings_blonde) September 26, 2024
It would’ve been even better if it was not 4:30 a.m.
#20
My 5 yo went to a birthday party this weekend where the birthday boy chose what to give out for party favors.
— Stephanie Rondeau (@StephDRondeau) September 23, 2024
He chose plungers.
Yes, real toilet plungers.
Cue 18 4 and 5 year olds running around with plungers like they’re the world’s best toy.
This child is an icon.
