Another week and and another round of funny and relatable tweets from parents!
Here are some of my favorite quips (and one hilarious video) from this week.
Wishing you all a great weekend!
Janene
#1
I suggest to my kid that she could leave her purse at home as she goes to spend the weekend at her grandparents house.
— mom mom mom mom mom (@notmythirdrodeo) August 11, 2024
“No, my money is in it.”
“What could you possibly need money for at Grammy’s house?”
“In case I need to make a bet”
#2
I try to ask my child questions instead of directly telling him things. I guess he's picked up on it because yesterday a little voice from the back asked me "mama, what is the speed limit here?" and when I failed to take action he followed up patiently, "is 68 bigger than 65?"
— Adriana Porter Felt (@__apf__) August 12, 2024
#3
“Mommy you need on your cute shirt. That shirt is not cute” – a 3 yo with her sandals on the wrong feet
— Princess | Mindfulness | Conscious Parenting (@themultiplemom) August 12, 2024
#4
I just got a text from my daughter asking if the clothes I washed for her this morning are still in the washing machine. I’m on the beach. She’s in the house. The same house as the washing machine. My daughter is 24 🤷♀️
— Michelle (@Meeshlwills) August 11, 2024
#5
My 6-year-old is looking at pictures of me when I was 18 and she keeps saying "You still look the same!" Might write her siblings out of the will and leave everything to her idk
— Kristen Mulrooney (@missmulrooney) August 13, 2024
#6
Scene:
— Darby Stouffer (@DarbyStouffer) August 11, 2024
4 year old asks me to be a horse.
4 year old asks me why I’m not doing a good job being a horse. I explain that I’m a little tired and having a hard time being a horse.
She says “Hey! Be quiet, horses can’t talk!”
#7
Discovered today that the 6yo has been using his allowance to pay the 3yo to do things for him.
— Ryan Delk (@delk) August 11, 2024
Apparently has been going on for months.
#8
Linus had his birthday party yesterday, but his actual birthday is tomorrow. I told him he'll be five years old tomorrow and he said, "again??"
— Hannah Posts (@HannahPosted) August 11, 2024
#9
at chick-fil-a, watching my son while he plays on the play structure. 5 year old girl walks in and he is SMITTEN. smiling, giggling, shy, the whole nine yards. his jaw is basically on the floor.
— 𝞍 Shin Megami Boson 𝞍 (@shinboson) August 9, 2024
anyway, he turns to me and very sweetly goes “I want dada go away”
#10
My 9yo wanted to be a doctor but now he wants to be an Australian breakdancer. Thanks, Olympics.
— Daddy Go Fish (@daddygofish) August 12, 2024
#11
My youngest said she's "tired of always needing to look things up" on the internet & would "rather live in the 1980s," so I took her phone, the tablet, canceled all streaming services, tossed her out the front door, and told her to be back by dinner.
— the Mom TruthBomb (@momTruthBomb) August 12, 2024
#12
We gave my child a wallet with a single dollar bill to play with. She now has three dollars. I don't know where the other two came from. Help.
— Joe (@JoePostingg) August 16, 2024
#13
13yo asked for a bulletin board and I assumed it was for, like, school things, so I got him one while he was at camp. He came back, saw it, and said “oh great, I can use that to keep track of my conspiracy theories. I’m going to need some red string.”
— Anne Thériault (@anne_theriault) August 13, 2024
#14
I asked my daughter what she wanted to wear for her back to school outfit and she said “darkness”
— Amber Sparks (@ambernoelle) August 15, 2024
#15
my daughter just announced to me her favorite subject is math & I'm totally aghast.
— Alicia Andrzejewski, PhD, she/her (@aliciaandrz) August 14, 2024
girl, there are not FIVE degrees in English literature between your parents for you to like math. please.
#16
7 yo: Can you do my homework?
— Jew in a Canoe ✡️ (@WillieHandler) August 15, 2024
Me: No. It wouldn't be right.
7 yo: That's okay. Just do the best you can.
#17
Told my 18yo we're out of mac'n'cheese, so he'd have to do something else for lunch for once. He says, "I'll just break into my personal stash." Goes into his room, rummages around, comes out with two boxes of Annie's mac'n'cheese.
— David Roberts (@drvolts) August 14, 2024
?????
#18
my 10 year old son is about to start trombone lessons this year at school.
— bonky (@shesbonky) August 15, 2024
his band teacher's intro email has me howling! pic.twitter.com/4o2XSQKF7v
#19
My son saw his first pic & mix yesterday and immediately turned into a Napoleonic general about to order a complex, multilayered assault. pic.twitter.com/Bn9i6I4yln
— Dave Rudden (@d_ruddenwrites) August 11, 2024
#20
Was so pleasantly surprised that my kids finished their pizza without getting it all over their faces… then I saw the curtains. pic.twitter.com/5c5RHuSOGC
— Mumnipotent Ruler (@MumOfTw0) August 12, 2024
And last but not least, the latest in the “texts from teens” series from The Leighton Show. These just crack me up…you seriously can’t make this stuff up!
@the_leighton_show Time to start juicing some lemons. All from your messages and comments #teenagers #text #funny #dad #parentsoftiktok
♬ Steal My Sunshine (Single Version) – Len
