Feeling Seen: How Many of These 25 Tweets Do You Relate To?

Me: I've been running 3 miles a day and eating clean. I'm down 0.25 lbs

Husband: I got up to change the channel yesterday and lost 32 lbs

— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) May 26, 2017

Microwaves should have a Get Butter To Room Temperature Without Melting button.

— Noah Garfinkel (@NoahGarfinkel) October 20, 2023

the number of turns i miss because my gps overestimates my ability to comprehend 600 ft

— That Mom Tho 🐦 (@mom_tho) April 20, 2022

I don’t know about y’all, but I don’t have any more passwords left in me.

— That heavy bottomed man? (@doctuh_p) September 14, 2021

The most important thing I've learned in life, and I can't stress this enough: you gotta make a salad in a bigger bowl than you think

— Kevin Farzad (@KevinFarzad) May 14, 2018

My favorite adult hack is when I carefully and thoughtfully put something very important away so I can’t lose it and then I never find it again

— Maryfairyboberry🧚🏻‍♀️ (@maryfairybobrry) September 13, 2022

Does anyone else have a plastic grocery bag full of other plastic grocery bags somewhere in their house or is that just me?

— Kristen (@Kica333) September 23, 2018

WHY DOES EVERY ONLINE RECIPE BEGIN WITH A 40 PAGE ESSAY ABOUT SOMEONES HUSBAND DOG AND KIDS AND A BRISK WALK THEY TOOK IN THE FALL AND HOW THEY LOVE THE CHANGING OF THE LEAVES AND THEIR DOGS FAVORITE TREAT. GIMME THE RECIPE HON MY SCROLL FINGER HURTS

— Chelsea Peretti (@chelseaperetti) November 22, 2018

I’m writing a fantasy fiction novel about a mom that has a cold and her family does things for themselves while she rests.

— @itssherifield (@itssherifield) November 23, 2022

Txt from wife: where r u
Me:kitchen
Wife:can u feed cat
M: I mean garage
W:bring in laundry
M:bathroom
W:clean toilet
M: Idaho
W:get potatos

— Grant Tanaka: Honky (@GrantTanaka) March 16, 2015

DATING: can’t wait to see you again

MARRIAGE: part of your knee was on my side of the bed again last night

— mark (@TheCatWhisprer) August 21, 2020

Y’all ever try to breathe quieter while walking up a hill so bystanders don’t hear you fighting for your life

— sweet dee (@deelalz) April 3, 2019

The rage I feel when people are in the kitchen at the same time as me isn’t normal

— Livyyy (@ms_livyyy) December 26, 2020

We DO NOT throw away perfectly good food in this house.

We put the leftovers in Tupperware, put the Tupperware in the fridge, let it go bad, THEN throw it out.

— Austen (@Austen) March 5, 2022

I don't like being asked "are you at home?" Please expand further so I can know whether I'm at home or not.

— max〽️ (@Maxthepapi) November 18, 2022

A movie with subtitles, but instead of writing out the dialog, they tell me where I know every single actor from.

— Ꮍᴀᴇʟ (@elle91) November 2, 2022

My walk of shame is going back for a shopping cart after realizing I can’t carry 23 items in my arms through the store

— Kristen (@Kica333) February 9, 2018

Sometimes I like to mess with my family and hide their stuff where they can't find it.

Like I put their shoes in the shoe closet, their jacket on a hanger and their keys on the key hook.

— Stay at Homies (@stayathomies) January 8, 2020

A thing I never realized about being an adult is that you will always be cleaning your kitchen. No matter if you get take out, no matter if you’re gone all day, you will be cleaning. the. kitchen.

— tiffany (@lifeattiffanys) June 28, 2020

Prayers for my husband who very tragically got me nothing for our anniversary when I specifically told him I wanted nothing for our anniversary.

— Jessie (@mommajessiec) September 28, 2020

Whenever people tailgate me when I’m going 40 in a 35 I always purposely slow down because it’s like I gave you an extra 5 and you didn’t appreciate it so now you get nothing

— Mon (@monschleichs) July 27, 2018

Stages of plant ownership:

1. I’m going to take such good care of you.

2. Oh no.

— Jessie (@mommajessiec) May 28, 2023

Whenever I see someone trying to parallel park I avert my eyes and continue walking giving them the privacy they need because I’m a decent human being

— Tomi Obaro (@TomiObaro) December 16, 2020

Hmmm, I found a strange piece of plastic on the floor that looks like it broke off of something, but I have no idea what. Better save it in the junk drawer until I die.

— SpacedMom (@copymama) December 4, 2019

If I complain about being out of shape I don’t actually want fitness tips and workouts to try. I just want to complain and remain out of shape. What is wrong with you people.

— Mommy Needs A Life (@mom_needsalife) March 6, 2021