Finding Comfort

Comfort. I feel like it’s what we’ve all craved during this crazy, unprecedented year. When you look at this photo, you might just see some odd bread and egg concoction. But not me.

I see my 8-year-old self, sitting at my grandparents little kitchen table in the Bronx, where I spent every Saturday as a child. My favorite person in the world, my grandfather, is at the stove, making me his famous “bread with egg in the middle”, just like he made for my mom when she was a girl. He is whistling a tune while he cooks, and frying the middle extra toasty, just the way I like it. I feel happy and safe.

I see my 12-year-old self, home sick from school, and my mom making me this same meal and letting me eat it in front of the TV, a special treat. She too, makes the middle extra toasty, just the way I like it. I feel happy and safe.

And many years later, it is me who is standing at the stove, making this for my own three children, when they are sick or needing comfort. I make the middle extra toasty, just the way they like it. I hope they feel happy and safe.

It occurred to me the other day that I’ve made this about a million times during the pandemic. WAY more often than I have in years. It seems I’m craving it constantly. And I think I finally figured out why.

Because when the world seems to be falling apart, it’s not so easy to feel happy and safe.

And because this food…well, it’s not just bread and eggs to me. It is Saturdays with my grandfather. It’s the feeling of being taken care of. It is family, who I have been missing. It is comfort.

So if you ate a little too much comfort food this past year, or watched too much TV, or let your house go a bit – so did I. If you didn’t learn a new language, or take up a new hobby, or finally hang up those photo frames, don’t feel bad. If you couldn’t seem to focus, and even the simplest tasks or decisions weighed you down…I get it.

You are not alone.

So here’s to better days ahead, my friends…if this past year has taught me anything, it’s to give yourself some grace, cry when you need to, and always, always, laugh when you can. ❤️


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My grandfather and I in our backyard
Bronx, 1973