National Best Friends Day: 22 Funny Tweets to Send to Your BFF

Friends don’t tell friends 1980 was 40 years ago.

— Jessie (@mommajessiec) February 22, 2020

my mom only remembers my childhood friends based on the perceived slights they committed against her 15 years ago. I’ll mention a name and she’ll just be like “ah yes, the one with the MUDDY SHOES.”

— Robert Schultz (@_RobertSchultz) August 17, 2021

My friend told me that I'm the most put together mom she knows, which is kind of funny because I just found shredded cheese in my cleavage.

— KJ (@IDontSpeakWhine) March 2, 2022

i want more "run errands with me" friends. no i do not want to spend $85 on a dinner to catch up. but i will go to costco and an estate sale with you and then some tacos

— arabelle sicardi 英梅 (@arabellesicardi) September 30, 2022

Everyone needs a friend who they probably shouldn't be allowed to sit next to at a serious function …

— Alison Nicolson-Rae (@Nicolsonraea) May 19, 2022

I like to have two conversations going with the same friend at the same time – one on Instagram and one over text and they must be kept separate

— Sarah J. Hass (@tacko_belle) August 30, 2022

I LOVE those type of friends that u can literally go agesss without seeing or even speaking to them but u are still close n whenever u see them it’s like u have never been apart ☝🏽☝🏽 that’s true friendship n friends for life right there

— abi dickson (@abidickson01) September 5, 2018

Mind reading exists in science fiction and between girls who are best friends.

— Adly (@TheAdly) September 2, 2015

All I need is a friend who says they are on their way over so I find motivation to clean-up in a panic but then they cancel leaving me alone in a cleaner house.

— Cydni Beer (@cydbeer) May 3, 2019

If you don’t think that motherhood is totally gangster, then you must not know about the underground gift bag recycling operation we are a part of. I haven’t bought a gift bag since 2008.

— Rachel Sobel (@whinecheezits) November 11, 2019

Male friendships and female friendships are so different. My wife knows her best friends' blood types; I got Christmas cards from two old friends with my last name misspelled.

— Henpecked Hal (@HenpeckedHal) December 21, 2021

Adult friendship is saying “let me call you back” hanging up and calling back 3-4 days later and no one takes it personal.

— B.Kizzle ✨ (@brooklynjusae) January 10, 2018

Being an adult means you have a total of 3 friends and they all live in different parts of the country and periodically you just send each other videos of weird dogs and say “this made me think of you”

— Ally (@TragicAllyHere) October 5, 2020

An adult friendship means exchanging bday gifts but not until 3-5 mo after anyone’s actual bday

— DonutHawk (@StruggleDisplay) February 10, 2022

I have a lot of great friends but when I text my friend Megan “So sorry we are running late to your daughter’s party” only she will reply “We are also running late to her party…”

Everyone needs a friend like Megan

— Cydni Beer (@cydbeer) October 4, 2019

20s – Friends talk about best happy hours in town.
30s – Friends talk about best mortgage lender in town.
40s – Friends talk about best gastroenterologist in town, and then go on to enlighten each other about the gory details of colonoscopy prep.

— Rachel Sobel (@whinecheezits) August 4, 2022

“Do you want to vent or do you want advice?” Just learning now, after 40 years on earth, that this might be the most important question to ask whenever a friend or loved one is upset.

— Jada Yuan (@jadabird) July 1, 2019

Do we all have that friend that when you go out with them it feels like they’re a local politician who knows everyone on earth and you’re their weird mute friend who just left the house for the first time in 8 years and is learning to smile again

— caitie delaney (@caitiedelaney) March 4, 2023

My son on why Caleb is his best friend at kindergarten: "He doesn't really speak English, so we can skip all the talking and just get right to the karate."

— Henpecked Hal (@HenpeckedHal) October 1, 2021

a year ago i was dumped & facetimed my friend walking my dog and fell. she was concerned but not concerned enough to refrain from taking a screenshot and that is true friendship pic.twitter.com/nPtvfAMEXR

— kenzi (@kenzianidiot) March 7, 2023