22 Funny Posts From Parents

Daughter is home from college and wants to know if we want to go do something at 9 PM. Uh, we don’t do that here.

— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) July 31, 2025

Me: did you wash your hair?

My kid: yeah.

Me: it’s not wet.

Kid: oh, this week?

— One Awkward Mom (@oneawkwardmom) July 31, 2025

My son has been having the lacrosse team over all summer to swim, and they've generally been chill, with normal teen boy stuff. This time, for the first time, someone brought his girlfriend and it is amazing to witness the vibe shift. Like someone injected speed into them.

— Sean T at RCP (@SeanTrende) July 29, 2025

Better stand right in front of the boarding line in case they start with zone 11 this time.

— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) July 30, 2025

Whenever my toddler is about to do something he's not supposed to he says ‘don't look at me,’ and that's how I know he's not cut out for a life of crime.

— One Awkward Mom (@oneawkwardmom) July 28, 2025

My children went to Chiefs training camp this morning and then spent all afternoon at the pool and now my 4yo is crying because his dad “won’t let him do anything fun today.”

— Jennifer Parker (@Mrs_JParker) July 28, 2025

Remember getting back to school shoes and not being allowed to wear them until school started? Ugh, the worst.

— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) July 26, 2025

I thought maybe I had this parenting thing figured out but then I handed my teenager a can and a can opener.

— I Hide From My Kids (@IHideFromMyKids) July 27, 2025

I’m in perimenopause and my daughter is on the cusp of puberty so it’s SUPER CHILL in my house right now.

— Marissa ☀️🌻💛 (@michimama75) July 30, 2025

Me: *on the pretend phone* So are you married?

4yro: No, but im looking for a husband in the desert.

Me: Im the desert?
4yro: Yeah
Me: are the men handsome there?
4yro: yeah, they have nice bow ties.

😆😆😆

Bow ties ARE handsome.

— Back-Up Tambourine Player (@UpTambourine) July 28, 2025

No one tells you the stuff your daughter needs for her first dorm room costs eleventy billion dollars.

— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) July 29, 2025

My daughter has been experimenting with her own versions of “easy, peezy, lemon squeezy” and today she said “easy, crazy, mountain skeleton” and that’s gonna be tough to beat

— Drew Davenport 🎃 (@The_Davenporter) July 29, 2024

tell me about the most unhinged object your toddler has developed an emotional attachment to. my 1yo has been carrying around a milk carton (empty) for 24 hours 😂

— 𝓜𝓻𝓼. 𝓢 (@smalltown_wife) July 28, 2025